Let’s all learn a little about choking

This is SO important. Please take a minute to read the graphic and send it to those who may find this information valuable. (Which, really, should be everyone.)

If you’ve ever been around a young kid eating, you have most likely seen them gag on a piece of food. Children have extremely heightened gag reflex. This function is skillfully designed to keep them safe when it comes to eating. Usually, when a child gags, they make a big show of it (and rightfully so. Gagging is terrifying to a little kid!). Everyone in the room will know they are struggling, and many people see that red face and hear the retching sounds, and automatically assume they are choking. They immediately run to the child’s aid and begin doing things like lifting arms and slapping backs. This, above all else, is actually the most dangerous way a person can react in this situation. Though the child may appear panicked, their body is reacting in the perfect way to clear the passage and prevent choking. Their tongues will likely be thrusting forward, they should be making a gasping or retching sound, and they will likely appear frightened. These gagging instincts help to protect the child and need to occur until the piece of food is completely expelled. However, when an adult or caregiver begins interfering with the process (screaming, back patting, arm raising, picking up, etc.), the child is MUCH more likely to actually begin choking.

Take it from someone who knows… Choking deaths are absolutely terrible.

Please take the time to look over the symptoms of each. I know we are always eager to help a distressed child, but there are times that this can actually do much more harm than good. I have seen it, and am so passionate about educating others, because ultimately it will save lives.

 

Gagging vs. Choking

Learn the riddle and spread the message by either sharing this post, or save the image and share that way. We can all help educate those around us and save lives! Choking deaths can be preventable. We just need to knowledge and discernment to help. Thanks everyone!


Do coroners cover-up suicides? 7

We received this question: How accurately do coroners report suicide? On the one hand, you don’t want to scotch any life insurance payouts, or stigmatize a family. On the other hand, accurate statistics are important for understanding trends. And on the proverbial third hand, it may be difficult to tell. How do you handle possible suicides?
I record all deaths, including suicides, as accurately as I can based on all of the information we have gathered surrounding the deceased. I would never alter or inaccurately record the circumstances of a death for insurance or reputation purposes, nor would any other coroner I have worked with. I cannot speak for everyone, obviously, but I would hope that the only coroners involved in cover-ups of this sort are the ones found in Hollywood. If we are unsure of the cause of death, we rule it undetermined. Again, that’s regardless of any circumstances. Death is what it is and we aim to accurately determine causes of death based facts and information.
That being said, I most certainly feel for the families that find themselves in those situations. Suicide is never an easy thing to go through. Handling the insurance aspect is certainly not a pleasant process. As far at the stigma – I know it happens, but I have to say that I find it incredibly unfair. Those left behind after a suicide often carry an immense amount of guilt and grief. I have witnessed family members place blame on each other for the suicide. I try to warn people to avoid going down the blame path. It tears families apart. I have seen it many times. Ultimately, no one is responsible for another persons feelings or actions, especially in relation to the act of committing suicide. The blame cannot lie with the people left behind. It is not theirs to carry. I hope that more people can come to understand these things and that this “suicide stigma” can cease to exist.
SPLifeline

A letter to you 4

To all the parents I have had to meet,

One of the hardest moments of my job in the Coroner’s office was having to meet you during the worst day of your life. It was the day your world stopped spinning and ceased to exist as you knew it. The day that marked the start of a painfully long and unwanted chapter. The day that the beautiful child you brought in to this world was undeservingly taken out of it. It was a day that I have unfortunately witnessed far too many times. A day that never gets easier for me to be a part of. A day that I desperately wish you never had to live. A day that I thought and felt all of the things I am telling you now.

Mothers, I heard the deep, primal sounding cries bellowing out of you as you sprawled over the precious child you just lost, soaking them with your tears. This sound pierces my heart and steals space from my soul. Each time I hear it, I pray it will be the last. Fathers, I witnessed you shake and sob and punch holes through walls, then beg me to let you take your son or daughter home. I cringe when I remember the sound of you pleading to rewind from here, to set the clock back a day and start all over again. My heart breaks as I think back on these moments, but there are a few things I want you to know…

I want you to know that I care. Then and now. I care so deeply about you and your child. I cared about all of the details you needed me to know about your child on that day. I took in every bit of the information you gave to me, because you knew them best, and I made sure to use it. This is not just a job to me and the day I met you was certainly not just “another day at the office”. I want you to know that I did everything in my power to make sure your child had what they needed. I would have stayed in the office for any length of time so that you could sit with them as long as you wanted. I want you to know that I tried to anticipate your needs and help you with anything I possibly could.

I want you to know that you didn’t have to worry about them after you planted that final kiss on their tender cheek and walked out of my door. I know you did, and probably still do, anyway, because that’s what parents do. But I hope you can worry a little less with the knowledge I was here, with a heavy heart, gently caring for them. I want you to see that I tenderly wrapped your young child in a blanket so they’d be comfortable, and that I always left the lights on in case they were afraid of the dark. I want you to know that I paused and took a moment to grieve over the days and milestones your teen almost made it to but would never get to experience. I want you to know that even though you could not be here to walk out those final steps for them, I did everything in my power to do it as well as you would.

I am completely aware of the fact that I am not you. I could never know how you feel or what you have experienced. I know that nothing would have truly helped you through this day. But I hope that you could find some small comfort in the fact that I was here, guiding your child through those last crucial steps in the same way would for my own. I want you to know that I took care to do everything properly and did my best to avoid making any mistakes. I want you to know that I fought with all that I had to get all of the answers you deserved. If justice was needed, I did everything in my power to ensure it was served.

I am horribly and truly saddened that we had to spend this day together. But I hope that in some small way, by some small measure, I played a part in the beginning of your long, restorative, healing journey. I want you to know that as that day ended, I sat at home, with tears streaming down my face, thinking of you. I want you to know that I have thought about you since that day, and I will continue think of you in the days and years ahead, because you and your beautiful child have a permanent place in my heart.

 

With so much love,

Jacquie

Deputy Coroner & Author of Spoiler Alert: You’re Gonna Die

 

(This letter was written for a few reasons. First and foremost, to the parents who have lost children. I just want them to know that there are people like me out here that deeply care for them and their children, especially in those final times. More importantly, I want them to know that people like me still care about and remember and grieve for them. Second, I know that in writing this, I speak for many coroners and other death investigators. The way we care for our families, whether they are children or adults, is a part of our job description as much as it is a part of who we are. You are the reason many of us come to work everyday and give our very best to the job. I wrote this in hopes that everyone becomes aware of what a coroner does. It is so much more than showing up to scenes and working on bodies. We are here for you, to find answers, comfort and assist in any way possible when it comes to the loss of your loved one. I hope that by coming to understand this, you can use us as a resource during your time of need, and that most importantly, you hold us accountable to do our jobs properly. We are here, we are available, and we want to help.)


David Bowie & Alan Rickman… Is there a death connection?

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We received this question: How often do you see patterns in death? For instance, two celebrities died this week at age 69, both of cancer. Considering the last celebrity to die at age 69 was over two years ago, two in one week stands out. Do causes of death, ages, given names, etc. tend to cluster?

David Bowie and Alan Rickman both passed away this week. Eerily, both were 69 and both died of cancer. Here are my thoughts: Deaths can happen in a cluster. There is a pretty widespread superstition that bad things, like death, happen in three’s. Though I am not one to really subscribe to these beliefs, I have experienced the same concept in my line of work. There have been multiple occasions where things will be really quiet at the office (because no one seems to be dying,) then suddenly one day the coolers begin filling up. In May of last year I had three heroin overdoses in one week. That many heroin related deaths is extremely unusual. Three in one week certainly stood out and prompted me to call the DEA. I also see an increase in related deaths when the weather shifts. As soon things get a little nippier around here, we experience an uptick in deaths. (They are usually respiratory related. Things like lung cancer, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, etc.) Then, of course, there is the whole theory on suicide and that happening at particular times, which I cover in Spoiler Alert: You’re Gonna Die. So, yes, my answer is that death can tend to cluster or follow a pattern. However, there is usually a reason or a cause for the increase. As far as David Bowie and Alan Rickman are concerned, I’d say their deaths were just a coincidence. An odd and unfortunate one, at that. Though, I guess if I’m being honest, there is always the possibility that maybe, just maybe, death does happen in three’s. And if that’s the case… who’s next?

 

 

The Golden Rule of Spreading Ashes 4

Thank you to everyone who has submitted questions! This blog wouldn’t be alive with you. With all the campaigning for this years election and interviews for the book, it’s nice to spend some time writing about what I know best; Death. Here are a couple questions we recently received.

 

-Why is a permit needed when spreading cremation ashes? What about for spreading them at sea?

I obviously don’t write the rules, so don’t take this answer as gospel truth. But, when it comes to the spreading of ashes, a permit is required simply because ‘they can’. I don’t know of any official reasons why it is required. Now, if you’ll stand by while I put my tongue in my cheek….I will say a lot of people dispose of ashes throughout the world, in various ways, and never ask permission. There are no cremains police running around arresting people. The position of almost every party involved is, “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” I’d be absolutely shocked if anyone of authority interrupted the beautiful and emotional act of spreading your loved ones ashes to cite you. There is one Golden rule: Take the identifier out of the ashes! Don’t just dump them. There are identifiers (usually round metal tags) that are put in the cremains at the crematory. Though the risk is very minimal, if someone finds the identifier and decides to check on whether a permit was acquired, it can be traced back to you.  Be careful and/or follow the rules.

Things are a little different when it comes to spreading ashes at sea. The law states that the cremains should be put in a permanent container designed to sink them to the bottom of the sea. It has something to do with the Clean Water Act. I am guessing they don’t want a bunch of loose ashes hanging out in the water. The permitting process would be helpful for you to discover all of the rules involved. For instance, you are supposed to be at least three nautical miles off the shore before dropping any cremains. You are also directed to determine the coordinates of where you have dropped them and report back to United States Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) within 30 days. This is understandable, as they would like to be aware of the points that permanent containers are being dropped in to the ocean. Again, though, I am quite certain many people spread ashes out in the sea without following these guidelines. It is really more a moral decision than anything else.

 

-How much time goes by before a body gets stiff?

The time for a body to get stiff (or go into rigor mortis) varies based on several factors: age, muscle build, temperature, etc. A general rule is that a body will start to go into rigor about 2 to 4 hours after death. It should be in full rigor after 6 to 10 hours. Rigor will typically start receding around 20 hours and be pretty much gone after 24 hours or so.

Have any other questions? Throw them my way! Don’t forget to subscribe so you can be notified when the answers pop up.

(We received a question related to investigating a suicide by a person named Andy. Hey, Andy, if you’re seeing this, send a quick email to askacoroner.com so I can get back to you! Very intriguing stuff and I’d like to send you some thoughts I have.)


Where do the braces go?

Here are a few answers to this week’s interesting questions!

When people die that have braces on, do you leave them on or remove them when you are preparing the body for burial or cremation?

Braces and any other type of orthodontic gear is left in place regardless of the type of burial/cremation being performed. That being said, anyone viewing your body would not be able to see or notice the braces. There is a lot done to the mouth when preparing a body for a showing and the mouth will always be fully closed at a showing.

When preparing the mouth, with or without braces, a needle injector is used to insert a tack with a long wire attached to it. One wire is inserted in the upper jaw (maxilla) and one in the lower jaw (mandible) and then the two wires are twisted together until the mouth is securely closed. Often, a piece of cotton or other type of mouth former is placed over the teeth to give a fuller, smoother look. With braces, cotton may be used to fill in any gaps or smooth out any edges created by the hardware. The lips are then glued closed. An alternative to the wire method is to use a ligature and a curved needle. The prepare would insert the needle in the mouth upward under the nose, across the top of the mouth and back down into the bottom jaw, then across the jaw and back out (four points). The ligature would then be tied together to secure the mouth closed.

Does a person pee or poop at the last moment of death?

The answer is sometimes it happens and sometimes it doesn’t. It varies from death to death and person to person. The most common thing we see is incontinence with urine. Poop is most often found with cardiac related deaths. This usually ties in to something we call “The Death Poop.” People with cardiac issues often have an overwhelming urge to use the bathroom and unfortunately end up passing away on the toilet.

Have a question to ask Jacquie? Make your way to the “Ask” tab on the website and submit a question to be answered. All questions are anonymous, even to Jacquie. In order to keep this blog interesting, we rely on you to ask all the questions you can think of!

If you’re hungry for more right now, check out Jacquie’s new book, released this week: Spoiler Alert: You’re Gonna Die. It’s filled with all the questions you won’t see here on the blog, as well as an abundance of information, humor and tips on how to prepare for death.


Bigger than Bodies.

I’m mostly known for managing dead bodies. Really though, my job is so much more than that. I facilitate the final pieces of the puzzle that is a person’s life. My job, by definition, is to answer two questions: What was the person’s cause of death and what was the manner of death? That’s it. Once I answer those two questions, I have met the minimum requirements of the job. Death, however, often leaves behind a whole lot more than those two questions. I work with the decedent (person who died) to find the answers. I am their final voice. At the scene of a death, there is a collaborative effort between the police agency doing their investigation and me doing mine. Though we have very different goals, certain areas tend to overlap and we are able to work together to find those answers – to complete that puzzle. We all contribute various pieces and ultimately we get them to fit and finalize the case. My unique skill set and advanced certifications make me one of the few people able to facilitate all these pieces fitting together correctly. I don’t take that responsibility lightly. I carry each family with me. I remember them. I think about them throughout the years.

I work with the dead because it completes my life.

I am here, writing this, because I feel that another part of my job is to help those affected by death. Which basically includes every single living person. (Yeah, you). Death happens. And not many people talk about it until a tragic situation forces them to. Though sorrow plays a huge part, there are many other aspects of death. Some entertaining, creepy, funny, and all together important aspects. As someone who is surrounded by all the angles day in and day out, I hope I can provide some of whatever you are looking for. Whether it’s about the fascinating world of corpses, shocking elements of my cases, finding closure of a death you have experienced, or learning more about processing a dead body, I am here, ready to provide answers. Death is all around us. Let’s talk about it – any and every part of it!

Sincerely,

Jacquie

Unveiling Death One Question at a Time